About Us

Photo by Mike Brown

The Subteens are a lovable band of misfits and morons who have happily failed every challenge set before them. Too stubborn to quit but too lazy to exert any actual effort, the group decided long ago that success is for amateurs. And yet somehow, amid alcohol-induced psychotic breaks, avoidable jail stints, and bouts of crippling depression, the group continues to drift menacingly around the local music scene like the Great Pacific Garbage Patch.

You have been warned.